Carpe Diem Weekend Meditation #98 Choka

Carpe Diem Weekend Meditation #98 Choka

Japanese long poem, or Choka

Chevrefeuille invited us to write a long Japanese poem

Spring is arriving

magnolia blooming again

winter is still here 

morning frost still on the ground

birds are not singing 

still cuddling their ice cold feet

heads under their wings

sleeping in the thick clad bush

Strange no birds singing, its cold

Winter is still here

morning frost still on the ground

mountain shining white

sun peeping over the ridge

Strange no birds singing, its cold

The choka can be of almost any length, because its form depends on alternating phrases (or lines) containing either seven of five sound units. The end of the poem is signalled by two lines of seven sounds. So the form is five/seven, five/seven, five seven, …. , seven/seven.

which is of a pattern 5-7 5-7 5-7 5-7-7. 

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20 comments

  1. never heard of this poem form – and the frequent use of the word “still” adds something to the feeling of how long winter has been there.

    and loved this imagery:

    cuddling their ice cold feet

    heads under their wings

    sleeping in the thick clad bush

    Liked by 1 person

  2. This is exceptional! You created wonderful imagery while maintaining the syllabic count perfectly. I’m glad we are taking a bit of a respite from that “morning frost still on the ground” and those “mountain(s) shining white.” I will try this poetic form using the green of our August mountains and the amazing late blooming wild flowers. 5-7 5-7 5-7 5-7-7… here I come!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I haven’t seen you around the poetry circuit for a While Elsie, welcome back! It’s easy to forget that while we are heading towards autumn, with the sun still on our backs, you are sailing towards spring, still feeling the cold!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Hi my friend, thanks for commenting, yes I have missed writing poetry, been busy doing my family tree on My Heritage.com, needs a lot of research, so many ancestors when you take in everything from both sides, my husband as well as my own, still a long way from finished. Have a great day.

      Liked by 1 person

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