
Japanese long poem, or Choka
Chevrefeuille invited us to write a long Japanese poem
Spring is arriving
magnolia blooming again
winter is still here
morning frost still on the ground
birds are not singing
still cuddling their ice cold feet
heads under their wings
sleeping in the thick clad bush
Strange no birds singing, its cold
Winter is still here
morning frost still on the ground
mountain shining white
sun peeping over the ridge
Strange no birds singing, its cold
The choka can be of almost any length, because its form depends on alternating phrases (or lines) containing either seven of five sound units. The end of the poem is signalled by two lines of seven sounds. So the form is five/seven, five/seven, five seven, …. , seven/seven.
which is of a pattern 5-7 5-7 5-7 5-7-7.
This is beautiful Elsie! I was thinking about you the other day. I’ve missed hearing from you. I pray all is well! 😀 ❤
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Thanks for the thoughts, appreciated. I see the doctor at the end of the month, looks like I have new lumps growing inside my top lip again, it is four years now since I found out I had ACC Cancer, keeping my fingers crossed, that all is well. Have a nice day.
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Good luck Elsie, that is always a worry, isn’t it? I can relate. Sending positive vibes👍🏻
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Thanks, nice to hear from you, hope all is well with you.
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Yes, thanks.
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All my love, prayers, and God’s healing blessings to you! Please let me know how it goes Elsie! ❤
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Thanks, I will.
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never heard of this poem form – and the frequent use of the word “still” adds something to the feeling of how long winter has been there.
and loved this imagery:
cuddling their ice cold feet
heads under their wings
sleeping in the thick clad bush
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Well done Elsie, like an extra long Haiku, maybe I’ll give a choka a try…..
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Nice!
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This is exceptional! You created wonderful imagery while maintaining the syllabic count perfectly. I’m glad we are taking a bit of a respite from that “morning frost still on the ground” and those “mountain(s) shining white.” I will try this poetic form using the green of our August mountains and the amazing late blooming wild flowers. 5-7 5-7 5-7 5-7-7… here I come!
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Sounds good to me, had enough of cold weather, looking forward to Summer. Cheers!
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I haven’t seen you around the poetry circuit for a While Elsie, welcome back! It’s easy to forget that while we are heading towards autumn, with the sun still on our backs, you are sailing towards spring, still feeling the cold!
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Thanks for the nice comment. Yes it’s a great feeling the seasons of the earth. Have a nice day.
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Hey, Elsie! Good to hear from you again!
I like the poem, and reminds me that winter will be here for us before we know it. Hope you have an early spring where you are. 🙂
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Hi my friend, thanks for commenting, yes I have missed writing poetry, been busy doing my family tree on My Heritage.com, needs a lot of research, so many ancestors when you take in everything from both sides, my husband as well as my own, still a long way from finished. Have a great day.
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It is wonderful to read you again! I hope your doctor’s appointment goes well.
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Nice hearing from you, Thanks, I hope so too. All the best for a wonderful day.
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Hey! How are you? I’ve missed your posting! 🥰
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I wonder if you would reblog your post on different types of poetry and syllable counts, etc. I lost my copy 🙄🥴
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